An empty cup of nothing
by Jester
Summary: Just a mottled collage of emotion. Bulma struggles with the realization that her relationship with Vegeta is based on his lust. It's up to you to decide who's point of view your reading... it's all very abstract
1. Epiphany

Epiphany  
  
  
  
Do you love me dear?  
As this numbing apathy sets in I wonder,  
Do you care for me?  
  
Why can't you understand   
That you've played a hand in causing this dark pain I now contain?  
  
As your soft fingertips brush my pale and trembling lips  
I can't help but flinch.  
Don't you see me dear?  
  
With cloying frustration  
You ignore my hesitations  
And grace me with an empty kiss.  
  
What kind of love is this?  
  
A salty tear streaks down my cheek.  
You've broken my will, dear.  
How does it feel to see me feeble, to see me weak?  
  
As always, you leave my bed satisfied  
Abandoning me to the harsh cold...  
And in the darkness I find  
that I wonder why you love me  
  
For my body?  
For my mind?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
next chapter... 'Surreal' 


	2. Surreal

Surreal  
  
  
  
Incarnations of an untouched angel  
  
Fill my thoughts with worldly sin  
  
  
  
there lurks a demon course and tainted  
  
I struggle to always keep within  
  
  
  
I'm undeserving of your love,  
  
Although I can't resist your flesh  
  
As instinct drives my body wild,  
  
I can't help but feel regret  
  
  
  
I've torn away your brilliant wings,  
  
Causing your decent  
  
And now I have a fallen angel,  
  
No longer heavenly blessed  
  
  
  
So now, with good intentions  
  
I leave your bed tonight  
  
With a burning resolution set firmly in my mind  
  
  
  
But any illusions I have of control leave me at your sight  
  
And the chains that bind my hidden demon are pulled so very tight.  
  
  
  
Look at me now, I've sinned again, I can't control my need  
  
The sad truth is I'm addicted to you, consumed by my greed. 


	3. Careen

Careen  
  
  
Will you cry for me with parched eyes as they lay me down to an eternal slumber dear?  
Will the heavens quake and your earth shatter when you see my still, pale form?  
Will you crumble in pain as the doctors inform you that i died of a broken heart?  
Would you defy the gods and man alike to ressurect my tattered soul?  
Would you crush hells firey gates and challenge satans fury to atone for my sins?  
As i press this knife against shallow skin i wonder if you would dear...  
  
As i feel the cold bite of steel to flesh i cant help but ponder these things...  
Never once did sweet words of warmth or love roll from your tender lips...  
I wonder if you used me, raped or abused me, or if we really had something real...  
I shudder to think that it was all just a trist, and you may have never, truly cared...  
Did you love me dear, or was i just a lacquer amusment, my emotions to be trifled and played with...  
  
As this blood flows thick, metallic inky red, i can't help but wonder if you'll care when i'm dead...  
As I acend high above or sink down below, will you think of me once? twice? before you repress my memory?  
Now, as i watch with glossy eyes transfixed and unfocused, i sigh for a moment over the cliche's of love...  
As silent whispers of the invading darkness play across my sences i can't help but hate you. because i love you...  
a smile of irony graces my lips over my simple ending... and i think my last thought...  
you always hurt the one you love... 


	4. The Nature of Hate

The Nature of Hate  
  
I see you sprawled across the floor  
  
Your blueberry hair spilt down your face  
  
I can still hear your silvery laughter  
  
Can see your stern yet gentle grace  
  
  
  
As I lay beside your body, thoughts fill my mind  
  
Images of darkness play behind my shuttered eyes  
  
I'm in a room, dank with darkness that fills me with despair  
  
It's like a play and I'm a puppet, too weak and small to care  
  
  
  
I'm in the room, I'm sitting, I'm tired, and pictures cross my mind  
  
Pictures of you smiling, frowning, thinking, flashing by in clips  
  
As these images pass me by, dark hands seize me from behind  
  
  
  
My captors take an empty cup and press it to my lips  
  
I try to spit or sputter but I know I can't resist  
  
As bitter liquid fills my throat  
  
I try to cough it up  
  
I try to yell, to scream, to cry  
  
My mouth is frozen shut  
  
  
  
Finally I'm forced to swallow  
  
My other choices gone  
  
I find my heart is strangely hollow  
  
As I realize that they've won  
  
  
  
As the bitter juice begins to pump throughout my every vein  
  
I close my eyes and heave my breath and the world now seems to change  
  
  
  
The empty cup is passed to me from one I now call brother  
  
I take a drink that fills me up, then pass it to another  
  
  
  
With one small sip I've joined the ranks of all-consuming hate  
  
Perhaps I could have fought it more, but now it's just too late  
  
  
  
One look at you, covered with blood, let my demon free  
  
Now there's no way to make things right, hope's abandoned me 


End file.
